A New Ear

for all the nonsense we hear around us……

Manmohan Singh will discover the man within like a certain Mohan Bhargava we know, and stop singing Italian tunes.
Americans will have a new president as George W Bush gives up the presidency in favour of his long cherished ambition – to become a permanent faculty at america’s premier institute – MIT- institute for the Most Insane Truants.
Nipplegate will become a tradition at Superbowl, with actresses, models, singers, socialites all vying for the honour (of course there will be a live telecast by DD)
Uma Bharti will feature in an Adnan sami video, thus giving cross border cultural relations the much needed boost.
Shahid and Kareena will tie up with Airtel to provide live lessons of mouth to mouth resusciation so that people can use it on other people when the need arises.
Chandrababu Naidu’s plans will become the blueprint for development activities in all states.
Real Madrid will pay the biggest contract amount ever to get Bhaichung Bhutia and complete their star ensemble.
Yechury and his ilk will be sent to his beloved land Russia, to be more specific, Siberia, forever.
Potholes will be found only in museums as they would be a thing of the past.
Traditional Indian stuff will make a huge comeback as things like sari (with accessories like blouse) and karva chauth will be endorsed by Mallika Sherawat, Neha Dhupia etc.
Sourav Ganguly will become the first non playing captain ever, in the history of the game.
Women will be legally permitted to cut off the appendages of men who try to use it on them without their permission.
I will convince myself that the paunch i possess is not an integrated 6 pack.
School children will use MMS for more constructive purposes like copying during exams.
Holland will take on Bangladesh and India in a triangular series to decide the #1 team in one day internationals.
Laloo Prasad Yadav will be given charge of the ministry of animal husbandry so that he can manage buffaloes and other ministers, and keep his nose out of mechanical contraptions like trains which are beyond his scope of reality.
Indians will find it in their hearts to outsource labour intensive work like construction to developing nations like USA.
Seers will take over the business activities of bhais, and corporates like Ambanis will seek them to eliminate those who try to bring out shady deals.
TV ads without Amitabh Bachhan will be back.

That, if you look closely was literally the manuscrypts wishlist for the year 2005, some with tongue in check, while others with tongue firmly in cheek.

until next time, go get that new year…. and spare a thought, a prayer and anything else you can spare for the less fortunate. this might be of help. (thanks kraz)